Your boat hits a rock and sinks near an island. You swim to it, save your life, and find four laptops there with #Linux preinstalled. Which one do you pick?

But hurry! Other people are swimming behind you, and in a couple of seconds, there may be fewer than four choices remaining!

@darth I mentally prepare myself to drown, with my hand protended to the skies while I gaggle my last words: "I use Arch, BTW"

@darth I'd pick whatever local aborigines use, which is probably Slackware.

@darth almost picked red hat, hesitated a little, then went with debian because the package collection would be larger and non enterprise-y features likely to be enabled.

but then i realized people who chose gentoo are guaranteed to have a complete and well tested toolchain and tons of source code cached. you clever fucks!!!

@darth @oleksandr What? Darth ŠČ? Not Darth Щ?

@ptesarik @darth Щлакваре

@oleksandr @darth Якщо що,
Щлеквер!

@Gizamaluke @darth offline circumstances are the best

@ptesarik @darth May I ask if sir also reads "queue" as к'ю, not куеуе? If so, sir is very posh.

@oleksandr @darth Oh, did you write it the way you read it? So, it sounds like Shchluckvurrah? Oh my… I prefer to be posh.
фак'ю

@darth @oleksandr thank you! that explains it

@ptesarik @darth @oleksandr i got to confess i was also quick to pass a judgement and suspected gentleman must be misguided to think that šč is a letter. apologies!

@darth @lkundrak @ptesarik Kill me if I ever suggest anyone learn Muscovian.

@darth @lkundrak @ptesarik But in fact this is what happens in real life: you learn Muscovian, then Muscovites declare you to be a part of their world, then they come to "liberate" you aka kill.

@oleksandr @darth @ptesarik yeah, learn polish. poland is large, lots of poles all around the world, works of culture are of higher quality, uses latin, and most importantly there's no ongoing supremacism epidemic among polish speakers.

(to be clear, i'm not suggesting language is to blame or indicative of anything. some of people i respect the most are russian speakers)

@darth @lkundrak @oleksandr My mother tongue is Czech, but if you want to try a Slav language, consider Slovak, because that language is somewhat understandable by other Slavs. It is sometimes dubbed “Slavic Esperanto”,

@darth @lkundrak @ptesarik But I will of course touch the war topic since I'm asked directly.

@darth @oleksandr @ptesarik everybody should be touching on these topics! there's entire large nation that has been brainwashed and desensitized towards suffering of others to the point it does not mind committing unthinkable atrocities. it is fueled by casual everyday supremacy, and if you've talked to a common russian person chances are you've noticed it. culture plays a major roles here and "protection of russian speakers" has been used as a pretext. i think that needs *some* sort of pushback, though not necessary picking on individuals who didn't choose their language.

@ptesarik @darth @oleksandr i can confirm. both western and eastern slovaks tend to be able to force themselves to speak slovak, even though they ordinarily wouldn't understand each other

@lkundrak @ptesarik @darth Espe-čočo?

@darth @lkundrak @ptesarik Donate to AFU, of course.

@darth @lkundrak @ptesarik Sure, let Muscovian forces leave Ukrainian ground, and I'm all for stopping any form of killings and saying "no" to war.

@darth @oleksandr @ptesarik my country didn't pick up the arms when it was invaded twice, because it would've been too powerless to defend itself.

first time the invader started the largest systematic torture and cleansing of country's most vulnerable minorities who posed no danger to anybody. then turned the country into a giant arms factory, its citizens into slaves working there, and went on attacking the other neighbours with a larger force. the whole insanity stopped only after incredible damage has been done, by those who didn't say no when called to war.

[1/2]

@darth @oleksandr @ptesarik the second time they merely shot a couple of people, stayed for a quarter of century and robbed whole generation of chance of a dignified life.

there's every reason to believe what is going on in this case is the former. the fuhrer's language, the value system, the system of state propaganda are precisely the same.

[2/2]

@oleksandr @darth @ptesarik yes, stand firmly on the side of those who are not voluntarily part of this.

@darth @oleksandr @ptesarik i got you wrong then. my bad.

i've been blessed to see things just get better my whole life, causing unreasonable levels of optimism. i'm struggling to wrap my head around the mechanisms behind these explosions of hatred, violence and indifference because i've been convinced they're a total taboo and a thing of the past (oh yes, fuck you steven pinker)

@lkundrak @darth @oleksandr To je taký umelý jazyk, čo kedysi vynašli na prehnitom západe.

@lkundrak @darth @oleksandr @ptesarik we are apes

@ljs @oleksandr @lkundrak @darth THIS APE CONTAINS NO DETECTABLE TRACES OF GREY MATTER OR OTHER SKULL FILLING
#certifid #fishskowl

@darth @ptesarik @oleksandr @lkundrak I'm only an honorary Slav in reality I am a naughty Brit

But I surround myself by Slavs

@darth @lkundrak @oleksandr POKVARENI zapad

@ptesarik @ljs @oleksandr @darth *high four*

@lkundrak @ptesarik @oleksandr @darth high 3, my other finger is being used to keep the skowl hole mseal()'d

@ljs @oleksandr @lkundrak @darth high … many, because I can't remember all my fingers

@ptesarik @oleksandr @lkundrak @darth don't you wave your toes at me you maniac!

@ljs @oleksandr @lkundrak @darth if you're nasty to me, I'll lift my kilt and moon at you
*shriek* *shriek*

@ptesarik @oleksandr @lkundrak @darth oh christ alive no no rhesus save me

@ptesarik @ljs @oleksandr @darth gentlemen

has this thread dérailleur again??

@lkundrak @ptesarik @oleksandr @darth I blame @vbabka

@ljs @oleksandr @lkundrak @darth @vbabka who was not even tagged?
*brachiates away*

@ptesarik @oleksandr @lkundrak @darth @vbabka his evil spreads further than his tags

@darth @oleksandr @ptesarik @lkundrak @vbabka HAIL FISH SATAN!

@darth @oleksandr @ptesarik @lkundrak @vbabka FISH DON'T CARE

@ljs @oleksandr @ptesarik @darth @vbabka tags

tags

*remembers that one encounter with the cache architecture dude*

*thousand mile stare*

@lkundrak @ljs @oleksandr @ptesarik @darth btw my most cited paper is about reverse engineering how caches work

@vbabka @oleksandr @ptesarik @darth @ljs link! link!

@lkundrak @oleksandr @ptesarik @darth @ljs uh damn the PDF used to be there https://d3s.mff.cuni.cz/publications/babka_investigating_2009/
it's all obsolete anyway :(

@vbabka @oleksandr @ptesarik @darth @ljs > it's all obsolete anyway :(
aren't we all :(

@vbabka @oleksandr @ptesarik @darth @ljs got it, thanks!

@lkundrak @oleksandr @ptesarik @darth @ljs I remembered few years later feeling much respect for the folks who got rowhammer work without cache flush instructions, i.e. from javascript. They figured out the exact way the pseudo LRU worked.

@vbabka @oleksandr @ptesarik @lkundrak @darth @ljs Obsolete is too aggressive. More for historical reference?

@vbabka @oleksandr @ptesarik @darth @ljs perhaps they paid attention in the cache organization classes!

@vbabka @lkundrak @darth @oleksandr @ptesarik interestingly, the linux kernel LRU is also written in javascript

@vbabka @oleksandr @ptesarik @lkundrak @darth @ljs the real mind-blown moment for me was when properly understanding the pLRU algorithm meant you could construct a memory access pattern that "amplifies the timing signal" of a cache miss, so that depending on whether a particular memory access is a miss or a hit, a bunch of subsequent accesses will also turn into misses or hits, and so the overall timing signal will be bigger:
https://security.googleblog.com/2021/03/a-spectre-proof-of-concept-for-spectre.html
https://leaky.page/plru.html

@vbabka @oleksandr @ptesarik @lkundrak @darth @ljs (that second link goes to a nice demo website that shows you a simulation of how the pLRU behaves during the attack)

@jann @vbabka @oleksandr @ptesarik @lkundrak @darth that is pretty mind boggling

Okay, so I got 114 votes here which is pretty good for someone with 1k followers. Meanwhile I did a test on Twitter to measure the usefulness of that website and I am not sure what to think of this result?

@darth depends. If the RedHat has MAGA written on it…

@root42 don't know, I live in the EU :)